Summary: Mindfulness is a secular practice that helps people to let go of negative thinking and beliefs and find resources within themselves, just as Buddhist practice does. It is possible then to go beyond this and come to a realization of not-self.

A student asks:

How does Mindfulness [a secular movement to apply meditation practices to everyday life, especially in a clinical setting] compare with Buddhist practice? It seems to teach acceptance but is that the same as Awakening? it could just lead to despair.

Lama Shenpen replies:

It is important to find a place in yourself that is resourced and confident whatever is happening in your experience.

Although studies on the Mindfulness that is taught these days to relieve stress show good results, often better than medical intervention – still there is a sizeable proportion of people for whom it doesn’t really work. I wonder if the difference lies with the extent to which people can find that place in themselves that is resourced and confident.

I have noticed over the years that meditation or mindfulness instruction is a tricky business because it requires a very open and responsive approach.  People have different associations with words and phrases so that what works for some actually misleads others.

For people who hear acceptance‚ in this context as some kind of order – who hear it as saying “just put up with it‚ stop complaining” – it is not going to have very positive results. So what might be a better way of expressing what is meant?

The important thing is to drop the habit of ordering yourself about in a heavy handed kind of way. Rather than telling yourself to accept your experience or any other kind of order, I think it’s important to ask yourself for a genuine response. So asking yourself “what do I really want more than anything else right in my heart of hearts?” might take you somewhere that you could never order yourself to go. It might be something like “I just want all this pain to stop, all of it, my own and that of others too.” No doubt as soon as you have voiced such a wish the thought will come up “But that is impossible…”

It is worth noticing that what it feels like as you find that wish in yourself. It is worth acting it out physically. For example, you might want to walk around the room or the garden in an open expansive way saying to the sky “I really wish for all this pain to stop for both myself and others.” As you do it, notice the strong voice that might even start screaming at you “It is impossible.” Don’t act out that voice. Just notice it is thinking. It is an emotional reaction and a strong thought riding on that reaction. It is a belief. You might find yourself saying “It is not just a belief. It is true.” So notice that you really believe it is true. That belief is a thought whether it is true or not. So now you have two things. You have a strong wish for happiness and a strong belief that it is not possible.

Acceptance or letting things be as they are in this case would be to accept that unfailing heart wish for happiness for yourself and others at the core of your being as being what you truly are, and to accept the fact that the strong belief that happiness is not possible is a thought that you don’t have to hold on to. You cannot get rid of the wish for happiness but you can let go of the thought that it is impossible. Would you say that was true?

Does that help answer the questions you ask above? A deep realisation of not self would naturally take you to that place of openness where you could let go of negative beliefs – but usually we do not have a deep realisation of not-self simply by practising Mindfulness. In Buddhist tradition we practise Mindfulness as a necessary foundation for coming to a realisation of not-self. Mindfulness is about learning to let go of negative thinking and beliefs and finding that resourced confident place in yourself that is your heart.

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